Grieving

Man! I really needed that getaway last weekend! As I sat alone on the beach early Sunday morning, I began thinking about issues that have been in the back of my mind for YEARS! A sudden wave of catharsis hit me. I’m still going through it actually. Over the last year, I went through a great deal of changes. On December 23, 2014, my marriage of two years and ten months, was dissolved. It was a relief, but also heartbreaking. Not only did I say goodbye to my ex, I said goodbye to my three-year-old step son. He called me mommy. He would crawl into the bed with me in the middle of the night when he was scared. Tugged on my clothes when trying to get my attention. He’d lay his head in my lap while we watched movies. He adopted some of my mannerisms and funny sounds. Opened the door for me when I got home. He looked up to me. He taught me a lot! My soul has been desperately trying to grieve that lost relationship, but I had been suppressing it. Telling myself that I’m over it and I’m fine, when I really wasn’t. Now, I am grieving but it’s totally cool. I feel better now that I’m actually dealing with it!

Rosales-Zavala-Curtis Family. 2013. At mothers’ house in Albertville, AL.

Josh and Puppy taking a nap on the new couch in 2013. At the place I once called home in Anniston, AL.

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